Blood on the Sand
by FreeToAGoodHome
Summary: Zack Addy made a friend in Iraq who helped him come to an important conclusion. Life is too short for denial.  Warning - implied/mild slash.


Disclaimer : I do not own Bones.

She sees him around base camp and it doesn't take long to connect Jack's Zack with Private Addy. He's pale, thin and uncomfortable – he shouldn't be there. She tries to speak to him; tries to spend a little time with him but she's hardly ever still anymore. There is always somewhere else that she has to be. She writes to Jack instead, telling him everything she hears.

She misses Jack. She's loved him for so long, but after Clarissa she didn't want to be the rebound and d then she missed her chance. They sleep together when she's on leave bit that's the closest she'll ever get. She knows it's wrong but she can't bring herself to stop. It's her dirty little secret, her guilty pleasure. And boy is it pleasurable.

She's used to life in the army now. There's no such thing a routine but she has learnt to go with the flow, not to object to orders. She just obeys. Then her best friend is shot. In a drunken stupor she spills her heart to Zack, the young genius stiff and silent as she cries. Then he reaches over, takes her hand and tells her,

_At least you have the words to say it._

She cries harder then, because Jack's so beautiful and she's not the only one anymore and poor Zack.

Her company's reassigned soon after and she doesn't see Zack anymore. She misses him. He's pushed to the back of her mind because there are more immediate things to think about, _(duck/shoot/run) _but she doesn't forget him. Jack's letters still make her cry but she realises that he loves Zack not her. He just doesn't realise it yet. It's strange. She's never liked his stories about Angela – hating her on principle – but losing him to Zack doesn't hurt. Well, not as much as she thought it would.

There's a raid a few weeks later and she finds that she'll be working alongside Zack. She tries to keep him out of the action as much as possible but it is Iraq and staying safe isn't possible. He dislocates something and tears something else so she picks him up and carries him as far as she can. Despite the dark and the gunfire and everything else she walks for miles. The company catches up with them quickly – no casualties. They offer to share the burden of Zack but she refuses. She has to keep him safe. It's her duty.

The ambush is exactly that; an ambush. She never expects the shot that kills her. She stumbles, falls, still cradling Zack close to her body. The world wavers as she pulls his face close to her, pouring out her heart, her soul. Her lifeblood.

She tells him not to let Jack know that she loved him, because he'll never forgive himself. She tells him not to turn out like her, regretting words never said. She tells him to look after Jack for her. She tells him to go home. She tells him to take the chance. She tells him to kiss Jack one last time for her.

Sargent Jeremia Cassidy dies kissing Private Zack Addy.

Zack's sent home soon after. They call it failure to assimilate but it's really because he's catatonic. On the plane home holds her dog tags so tightly that they cut into his palms. He reads the inscription one more time.

_A kiss from Cassidy is good luck for life._

He murmurs it over and over again like a chant, wondering if it's true. He knows it's from Jack. It just seems to hold some of his essence within the words; his humour and sarcasm and everything that is uniquely him.

He goes straight to the Jeffersonian. He couldn't sleep even if he wanted to. Angela screams and hugs him; the others welcome him back in their own ways. He doesn't speak. He remains rigid and turns slowly to Jack. He's been told what he's meant to say about duty and sacrifice, but all he can think of is her lips on his and blood on the sand.

Instead he holds up the dog tags and Jack knows. Jack knows and he begins to cry in the sudden silence. Zack steps forward, presses the tags into his hand and whispers.

_She told me to give you this._

And kisses him.

It's everything he's ever wanted; despite the tears and the memory of dead lips and blood. Jack clings to him, desperate for the contact even as Zack pulls back.

_A kiss from Cassidy is good luck for life._

He speaks gently and now Jack is crying and laughing and can no longer stand so Zack takes his weight. The others leave them. They understand that they need privacy right now.

They end up in the diner, because where else would they go? Zack slowly spills the story of the woman who befriended him. He tells Jack how she ate with him, and talked to him. How she understood the need for silence and the need to make noise to drown out the silence. He tells Jack about how she carried him and how she saved him. Zack tells him how she died and that her last words were for him to take care of Jack. And then, on impulse he kisses Jack again.

_From Cassidy?_

Zack shakes his head.

_From me._


End file.
